Dude, I don't think I'll ever be able to find a girl for me...
Is this the gay conversation?
I put my bosses number in my phone as "Do not call," I shouldve known my drunk curiosity would overcome any desire I had to keep my job.
again?
he's making romantic advances towards me. and he has a pet snake. 2nd part not relevant, but interesting.
in the 'for' section of the check i put "when we got drunk and broke things". again im sorry.
She kept saying "I'm going to hell" the entire time we were fucking. I really wasn't sure what to do... so I agreed with her.
That was definitely the right answer.
We're going to play a drinking game. It's called "Senior Year of College."
Things you are not allowed to do while im gone: sell cats on ebay, put cats in freezer again, shave cats like lions, dye cats pink/blue, try to light cats on fire to"wake them up from their nap" agian
Help. All alone. Room is. Changing colors. Dance party 2010, but without dancing.
Today as a vday present for myself I am walking in between any couples I see on campus.
Before we fucked we both mutually agreed not to tweet about it.
Got laid at work. Yes, AT work, why they let me run this tennis center by myself speaks to their poor judge of character.
you sternly forced jackson to start preheating the oven around midnight so you could make bagels in the morning
you were serious about those bagels
It was literally 8 o'clock in the morning. His horniness knows no bounds.
MEG JUST LICKED A DRAIN PIPE. DAVE PUNCHED MATT IN THE THROAT. ALL BOUNDARIES ARE DOWN. I REPEAT. ALL BOUNDARIES ARE DOWN.
The way I see it, there's 2 types of friends. Those you should do drugs with, and those you really,really shouldn't.
Randomize
