dude you apologized to her after she called you stupid. you were like "no i'm sorry, you shouldn't have to be around stupid people, it's my fault"
I finally had sex with him last night, but we used a condom so it doesn't add to my number of sexual partners.
I woke up 25 minutes ago and have been high for 20. Impressive?
I know I hit you with my car but people express love in different ways. Everyone is different.
i was playing the convince him im sober game through texting. i spelled most of the words right. i hope.
booty call birthday vouchers, best idea ever. it's like giving a present to myself for someone else's birthday.
yeah, i'm not. but i'm ready for free bjs. it's just hard to find women who will give me a beej while i'm sobbing uncontrollably
as of this morning I have officially vommed on the highways of 6 different countries. It's a proud moment.
she's drunk at 2 in the afternoon again. at least my mother is predictable.
Ok roommate is officially weird. Just watched her microwave the same broccoli 3 times in a row and cry b/c she fucked it up. Wtf lol
Is buying her a loofah for my house commitment like? I don't wanna give the wrong idea
Vodka?
Forever.
Really? A fat girl?
I'm walking her back. Chill out.
She is a nice girl okay. For some reason we are in my room though.
I know it's 10:30am but Finding Dory starts in an hour, and I have four points of molly. You down?
what color bed sheets say meditative warrior but also welcome to my sex dungeon...
navy blue
The fact that you have an answer to that is why we are friends...
Randomize
