Denial is the first step to alcoholism…and I don't hate it
So apparently I told him I was off to go "whore skipping" and I disappeared into the night skipping down the street. I know this because there's video.
He had an itunes playlist named "def not Glee season 1" which contained all of Glee season 1
He picked me up from the airport wearing nothing but a trench coat and a bow on his dick
I just realized that there are baby oil soaked hand prints on the wall over my bed. Last night was a good night.
I saw him walking to campus with his beer in his hand in the same sweats he wore walking to campus with a beer in his hand yesterday.
I woke up and watched my kitten suck on his nipple. Way too hungover to intervene. He thought it was me, so he just giggled and mumbled "mmm girl."
Seriously? God I hope he wasn't lactating.
......... Poor kitty
SEXX, SEXX, SEXX,SEXX,SEX SEX SEXXXXXXX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEXSEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEX.\nimagine that to the can can song. also come to my house. theres a dance routine.
Hold on, I need to find something to wear that says "I don't contribute to your daughter's drug problem"
Thanks for bringing me tea/a bucket. You have earned yourself a face touch.
Funny how the post-sex UTI lasted longer than the entire relationship.
you should probably call the Bronx Zoo in the morning to formally apologize
its the right thing to do
I just got the high sucked out of me. Fuck.
Jarrod's passed out on the chair with a cup of milk and I've been staring him down in an attempt to use telepathy to make him spill it. Attempts unsuccessful.
Did I penguin dive down a hill last night?
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