I went out, and slept with my sunglasses on
i'm so hungover...i might vomit in a handbag instead of selling them
Wouldn't be the first time..I think there's a subliminal message constantly playing in my mind that says 'blackout', 'throwing up is fun' 'too sober'
just went back to the bar and asked if they found a shoe last night.
We made it a contest to fuck on everything in your room while you were on vacation.
Remember when we pinky swore we'd never feel hungover alone...
yeah its nbd she just bit me in the face. be there soon
Just talked to Laura, confirming that is my bra. Hope it goes well with the rest of your wall decorations.
You are a lesbian wizard with red hair. You are willow
If I had your job the next day id be on the news. And not the good news. Like fox & friends. Nancy grace would have my ass.
Also, I found this app that is basically a tamagochi from the 90's and now I finally have something to keep me busy at work!
Why did I wake up with BYOB sharpied on my stomach
My New Years resolution is to not hook up with random guys.
Mine is to not hook up with anyone who has a kid.
I just bumped into this random I hooked up with a few years ago at Steve's party. Talk about a fingerblast from the past!
operation Bang Australian Boy = oh so successful
Randomize
