Just found the book "How to Stay Christian in College" on my roommates desk. At a loss for words...
So apparently I ran down the hall to another party and started handing out uncooked spaghetti to strangers. You'd be surprised how many drunk people will eat raw noodles.
what am i going to do when LOST is over? What am i going to get high to?
You broke into someone's house and stole a pan of lasagna.
I feel like I just gave a blowjob to a freight train.
I think Vodka is my favorite. Everything else ties for second.
Use "feeling words"
Yay
You climbed on top of the bar, shotgunned a 25oz fosters and screamed, Steve Irwin was a God amongst men.
dude I just found tht weird ass guy u invited last night passed out in my closet.... apparently he "couldn't find the exit"
In the future, could you not call me 'bro' while we're having sex?
I remember sitting in your lap naked saying I don't want to be all looks while you gently rocked me back and forth
He managed to rip my nipple last night....
DIBS on your mom for my beer pong partner.
He couldn’t find my clit with a map. Literally. I drew him a map.
I wish I got tanner on friday but I feel like I spent most of my time puking in the bathroom. I love my life
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