Wooohooo! I'm sitting in the car like a creep watching people walk in and out of Blush. Lots of happy people.
so when am I gonna get some from you?
when you dick grows 3 inches
At lowes after workin outside. Kid behind me says "mommy that man smells like a taco" yes she was talking about me.
you scanned your fake to get into the dorm last night and when the lady told you it was the wrong card you looked at her and said this is who i am thursday night
i think im the only person who makes thank you cards for their drug dealer
Just found my mom passed out in my bed holding a bag of wine. Not sure if I'm ashamed or proud.
is this the sara with the beer cane?
were drug buddies, doing lines off her ass is just a bonus
Woke up under the lifeguard stand sleeping next to mitch our homeless friend. I bartered a summer wardrobe for his last 5 dollar to buy a bfast sandwich. Bring clothes
Lmao the neighbor heard yall last night She wanted me to tell you way to finish strong
About to trim my pubes so if you decide to walk in, viewer discretion is advised.
So wise, so handsome, so good at oral sex.
Just please don't close your legs while I'm down there again. I don't want my death to be labeled as "Head crushed while giving an individual cunnilingus".
But Keith is doing MDMA for New Years and he's 39.
Keith has a beautiful 20 year old girlfriend, a good job and a cute puppy. We can't all be Keith.
But I want to be Keith.
I don't want to just hook up with random dudes. I've had enough bad sex to know that it's not worth hooking up with strangers
It's not?
Randomize
