Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
You watched "From Justin to Kelly" and sang along to more than half of the songs. I didn't know whether to laugh or to be insanely frightened that you knew almost all the lyrics.
get over here soon, theyre throwing bbeers at us from the roof. keyword : throwing
Legitimate concern. Who am I going to have birthday sex with?
Hey. Me and my buddy are drunk. you wanna give us tattoos of the hawaiian punch guy we shall pay very well. Seriously dude. no bull shit.
I'm convinced that college is the only place where one can have an existential crisis over what sweatpants to wear
Why can't I hire someone to teach me how to be a decent human being?
How did work go after you told them you were in jail?
Great they tried to bail me out.
in honor of breaking bad starting soon, i am now banging a walter white lookalike. viva heisenberg!
He was so drunk and proud of his 6-month-gym-results he actually made me touch his whole naked body.
I don't know why I do this to myself his dick is a constant source of disappointment.
The last thing I need is a possessed urethra.
I may be a complete scumbag but even im not willing to spend a grand and sit on a plane for 24 hours just for shrooms and a blowjob
Lady Gaga is doing the 1/2 time show. I hope it's gay and liberal as fuck.
Can you please come in my room and pour water in my mouth? Too hungover to move. btw who is this guy in my bed? Can't see his face. Cute?
Randomize
