do you think he would believe thats it not really my period, and that i ate a lot of licorice?
Beverly Hills, 90210. Cleveland Browns, 0.
I just saw a kid walk into class with his dad. Fuck his life.
dude your girlfriend loves you alot..she yelled your name lastnight in bed
My valentine's day: watching The Notebook, and porn, eating chocolate, and ice cream. All while jacking off.
Wow... you've managed to cover all of the sad girl stereotypes that exist.
He gave me a book last time I slept there. Im beginning to feel like a really weird hooker. Like instead of money he gives me random shit he has lying around. like hamburger buns
I expect to be treated like a lady. Even If your sticking it in my ass.
This guy either needs to stop touching me or buy me another drink.
my roommates tied me up with rope and duct tape then left me outside the door to the hot girls' suite on my floor, knocked on the door and ran away leaving me there with a sign that says free
He's probably the biggest I've seen outside of the porn I vehemently deny watching and he asks if I think he's too small
WHY WONT HOT GETMAN MAKR PUPR WITH ME!!!!???!?!!
I'm wine drunk & this is not good news for anybody
YOU RAISED A SWORD OVER YOUR HEAD AND SCREAMED AT HIM WHAT THE FUCK ELSE DID YOU THINK WOULD HAPPEN?!
the insurance claim form from last night says foreign object removal from genitourinary tract so as far as the insurance company knows, it could have been a gerbil
You did an excessive amount of blow and then screamed "WHO THE FUCK NEEDS A LADDER?!" And then Mario style wall-jumped onto the roof. It was one of the most impressive things I've ever seen.
Randomize
