Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
We totally just fucked in a closet. These vacations with his family are causing creativity I never thought I had.
Drunk versus high capture the flag: what team is everybody gonna be on?
If you invite me to a bar tonight my liver will kick you in the testicles
Someday you'll be stoned enough to create a one-person step team and then you'll understand
was it me or did you scream 'champagne motherfucker' when you punched him in the face ??
Would you wanna look up as you cum and for a split-second see your dad?
Well for number 40 i would prefer to at least like the guy attached to the dick
dude girls our age are getting married and having babies and I still can't figure out how to defrost my hotpockets
I got so high that I ate a protein bar while in the shower. I then proceeded to leave half the protein bar and the wrapper on the ledge in my shower. Haha oh well.
I just sat on the floor of my shower for 20 minutes to punish myself for drunk me's decisions.
You're going to replace me with a robot made of heating blankets and a vibrator?
So I heard her yell at him and I went downstairs to find he had lit up each one of my smokes and taken just one drag off each and had em lined up on the table. She says he "experiments" when on Ambien.
last time we tried to watch a movie together, we ended up having really aggressive sex. during the Lion King. so what Disney classic will we be ruining this time?
He ate me out in a golf cart while I watched the sunset. You are so right, golf skirts do provide amazing access.
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