After I made out with her she fell asleep and started pooting in her sleep. Are we sure lesbians are hot? Cause that wasn't.
Have u ever been so drunk that pissing urself felt like a better idea than walking to the bathroom? I entered those waters last night
well i was about to unbutton his pants but then i realized they had an elastic waste-band, so no, that didnt happen
There were 4 naked women demanding my presence. Of COURSE I got into the pool.
eat the baked goods on the counter at your own risk... i made them while i was angry and drunk so they most likely have pubes in them
We sent off fireworks off in the taco bell drive through. They're taking it way too seriously.
so exactly what is concert sex etiquette? Before, during or after???
all of the above
Matt you can be anything you want to be. Including the awesome guy that brings pizza to a bunch of stoned and sorta drunk kids.
He passed out in the car on the way to the party. Seabiscuit tripped before the race even started....Lil bitch....
nana can keg stand better than me. should i be proud?
I knew full well that at some point during the night my penis would be out with this costume choice
I'm allotting you four buildings to piss on tonight. Choose wisely.
I just saw the co founder of Waffle House passed away Friday. Are you okay?
That's about the same time my life started falling apart... Coincidence?!?!? I think NOT!!!
What color nail polish screams, "Either fuck me or get the hell out of my way"?
you asked how they got the microwave in the air. we had to explain three times that it was mounted there until you finally feel asleep
Randomize
