I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
I just saw a girl walk by me wearing a "kiss me I'm pro choice" shirt. Is that a signal for easy access?
We're sending your burrito through the mail slot.
hot doctor. gonna get him to touch my tits. 'think i felt a lump' excuse in 3-2-1...
you handed me the dorito you were about to eat and told me to 'keep him safe' while you went to the bathroom
Sorry about bonging beers with your mom but in all fairness you were late...
in my defense i said 'lock up your wives' before going out.
If it's any consolation, I've been sitting in the hallway in assless chaps for the past thirty minutes
Do you think that my Facebook profile picture kinda look like im being raped by a 10 foot polar bear ?
I heard liver failure is in for 2012 anyways
I just realized I donated our bong to goodwill.. RIP Kimbo Slice
You suck, She hit so hard.
I want to just live in between your butt cheeks.
Bring me that man meat
You were holding onto her boobs like you were adrift at sea and they were the only flotation devices
Have you ever been anal in a bush on the Vegas strip drunk?
Randomize