i just fell asleep at my computer and i woke up and in the google bar it said delicious foods to eat
I don't remember. Are we still dating?
i found out what alaskan girls practice during those six months of darkness
I just kept pointing at random people and telling the bartender to put it on their tab.
Also they do not have any come back to america, i miss my fuck buddy cards at Hallmark.
What? My family got wasted on patron and I threw up on my pants and said it was gravy. Hot mess.
cool, get new shit, I dnt want the same old if it's my last drink ever
The world isn't ending you idiot. I'll grab beer
just woke up on a lounge chair wearing a durag and holding burrito wrappers in my hands
I walked in on him fucking my best friend. I think we've reached the point of following each other on twitter.
I have bite marks all over my ass. Is that an acceptable excuse for missing class?
This will always be remembered as the Christmas I had 15 Russians sing christmas carols to me at 130am alone in a gas station while I was stoned on pot brownies
you got drunk, told him he looked like shaggy and said 'I wouldn't show you my mystery machine for all the scooby snacks in the world'
I really love you gals. I'm sorry again. I'm just super protective of my poutine
I will not abuse the gift that was given to me
You were given a vagina and you abuse that pretty hard
I am now gainfully employed. Parents, lock up your children.
Yay! Welcome to the world of "you're seriously trusting me with your kid?"
Randomize