just had a super intense, drunken debate about which blink182 member is the most fuckable. i got so mad i left the room. new low.
You never realize just how much you have to be thankful for until you almost shit yourself in a Target.
I am tired of kissing girls with mustaches.
I'm not sure how exactly, but this funeral has turned into a ridiculous night of drinking games
When I try to close my eyes ibwant to puke. Going to the basement to watch pocohantas. That'll keep myeyes open. And puke free.
Did you seriously take investment advice from our coke dealer?
Whatever. I indirectly made you cum overseas. Call it even.
took off my bra and popcorn fell out of it. im gonna puke at this wedding...
Carson when you get home I want you to go downstairs and go into each bedroom and pick up the underwear and either throw it out or give it back to the people who own them. Look all over the room. Thank, Love Mom
I'm hungover laying in my moms bed watching Space Jam.. Adult Life..
She doesn't even give a fuck about angle. I seriously gotta start doing like penis yoga or something.
Went to go look for a friend that was missing since 3am, found her passed out in the hallway of the apartment, guessing it was a good night
wtf why is there glitter all over my dog
Matt is trying to convince me that we have a deal where if I show him my tits he won't do cocaine. Apparently we shook hands on it?
Kay so its 9 am whose dumbass is gunna act sober to buy pizza rolls
Dude you promised
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