at a party and just made O-H-I-O out of dicks and vajayjays...i hope someone took a pic i was too busy (; GO BUCKS!!!
nah, shes just mad because we went through all her fb pics and tagged her crotch as all the guys shes fucked
The girl sitting next to me in class is writing her to-do list under the title 11/31.
man, work is way more interesting with these acid flashbacks.
No she hasen't showed up to my place yet, last I heard she was puking as she was walking without stopping near the park.
Just had a nice conversation with my landlord while cleaning your puke off my car
They poked me and kept screaming "LAUGH DOUGH BOY" it's like 3rd grade all over again.
I made a tournament bracket for the girls that Im talking with.
And apparently midway I said "hurry up and finish so we can talk about what a bad idea this was"
The stripper just invited me to take shots with him out at his car after he gets off stage.. I mean why not? I've already seen everything he's got and it'll be easy to get him naked.
i introduced myself to everyone by my new name, thundergooch. i threatened the neighbors with a hammer when they used my real name. needless to say, sailor jerry was not kind to me.
I can't believe you picked a finger in the ass over lunch with me.
Today is a shit your pants at work kinda day
The amount of drunk I'm going to get tonight will be somewhere between Jim lahey and bojack horseman
i'm pretty sure my brother is still drunk from last night. he's telling my parents that humans are at the top of the food chain for a reason and listing off all the exotic animals he would eat
Randomize
