Wow that girl who lives a couple houses down is going out wearing butterfly wings a skirt and fishnets
Do you think anyone has ever tried to have sex with a cows udder before?
I have a feeling this won't be the last time I wake up wrapped in a shower curtain with the words "Blame Bono" spray painted on it
is facebook stalking your hot therapist socially acceptable?
someone needs to get her out of the garbage can shes never gonna forgive us for this
Walked in on my boss having phone sex at work... and somehow this didnt bother nor embaress him
Def regretting not writing "will blow for extra credit" on my last final
Wow, nothing is more special than changing the channel and seeing the guy who groped you on Saturday night...
I can only only sleep there on nights I orgasm cause he snores so loud and if he leaves me hanging one more time ill probably cut off his dick from lack of sleep and frustration
At some point, it turned less into sparring and more into tough guy dry humping.
I'm shoveling snow with a camel-pack full of beer in a blizzard. I love snow days as an adult!!!
I think my sunburn makes my ass look bigger
Personally, I'm gonna be Sexy Dobby the House Elf.
Its like my group of friends and I are all dating and we're all just a bunch of Swingers, is that normal?
THERE HAS BEEN GRANDTHEFT IN THE HOUSE. SOMEONE STOLE THE BABYWIPES AND YOU NEED TO BUY MORE BEFORE WE LET YOU IN. oh and you have to take two shots before we'll let you in. with no chaser.
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