i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
Well, she's an atheist who is addicted to the Sims.
Who isn't?
Just found 50 pesos and a coke spoon in my dads old shit. Gotta love the 70s
It would be been irresponsible not to make cleaning the apartment into a drinking game
He was singing Justin Beiber while we did it. I love secure Spanish men
Ok so now that we've actually had sex do I get the last name or are u really witness protection status?
I'm by the dj to the left. Come get me now this girl is talking about baby names and I dnt even no hers
I can't see you
I'm the only one that's wearing a tarzan outfit get your ass over here you douche
And then you proceeded to sneak behind thee bar and hold up an empty bottle of vodka and scream LOOK WHO THE BARTENDER IS NOW BITCH!
I know you're gay. But if I'm not getting dick, then you have to. That's what friends do.
I can't help that I bring out the sex in people
Nothing says "class act" like eating acid in the middle of a Buffalo Wild Wings
I'm eating cheesecake with my hands completely naked while falling asleep
Just walked out of the train bathroom after having sex and got a round of applause from the passengers. Definitely the best part of the trip.
Just told my mom life fisted my asshole. She looked at me with complete understanding. I'm scared...
I just remembered something from last night. check your closet.
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