Chicken burrito, or no deal.
Is that code for my vagina?
Who the fuck has ever referred to a vagina as a chicken burrito
so i told my doctor my symptons and she just shook her head at me
I no longer want to be the gay that plays in the revolving door at RelationshipDale's like a seven year old with a.d.d.
there should be a national holiday dedicated to how high i am
There are beer cans & oyster shells along the side of the road. I belong here
this is worse than the time i threw up a condom.
I did too many shots and now a kitten is trying to eat my bagel.
We all make mistakes. Just lock them up deep down inside your mind so they can surface as weird sexual fantasies it takes your therapist years to decipher when your 40
its amazing there are so many photos of me and him separately, since most of that party time was spent sneaking away to fuck upstairs...
I'm starting to think I didn't bring enough liquor for this family Christmas.
It's 2 pm....
I figure even if it starts out as just sex I can bang him into loving me
Happy Halloween!! Last Halloween we spent together you got brought home in a shopping cart
if becoming an adult is chugging a bottle of wine in your bed and crying about your stresses while your dog watches you, sign me up
I also guarantee you multiple orgasams and blueberry pancakes
so he found out i have him as "average size" in my phone. fair to say we arnt going to be dating anymore
Randomize
