Dude ... paraplegic porn is really creative..
so basically i'm the" little sister", he's the "big brother" and we just fucked
I would give away a ton of these clothes but I doubt there are any homeless people who dress as slutty as me
the girl in my class has a rolling backpack and just told it to stay. im too hungover for this.
Just had to throw up on the floor of my car during traffic on the way to work. Car next to me saw both times. Found the downside to having a job right after graduation.
I was so proud to be driving sober that I wanted to get pulled over so I could tell the officer I hadn't been drinking.
He's coming over, and I hope he doesn't get hungry. I'm sure its not proper protocol to bring one booty call to another booty call's house for the munchies.
I made him say "i realize i'm cheating on my girlfriend" five times aloud before i would hook up with him. Somehow that has to lessen my bad karma
My tongue is raw from licking all that salt with my tequila shots...happy cinco de mayo
I assume you passed out however I'm drinking jäger and beer in bed with my cat so your friendship world have been appreciated
well I didn't shave for the hot dilf I banged last week so I'm sure as hell not shaving for you. Sry
I don't give a shit if you judge. This isn't about you or anyone else. This is about me and my chicken tenders.
Just want the two of you to know, I went to a golf tournament today. Respectable, expensive… Flipped the golf cart. Seriously, I'm 40. What the fuck?
listen. i haven't sucked a dick in well over three years but i believe in myself.
The Lion King Is on YouTube
Until 2 minutes ago I actually had a chance to pass my midterms... thanks alot
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