2 nights ago she wants to see other people, tonight she wants to have a threesome. The GOOD kind of threesome. So... win?
just peed in the tub, threw it on Megan.. she threw more back, I got out and threw toilet water on her.. forecast for tomorrow? pink eye.
im too high. i could barely wash my hair, let alone handle a whole shower
I wonder how many times I can be hungover in one day
this stripper weighs a pound. I feel like I should tip her in food.
cliffnotes. writing studyguide on last pack of smokes. glad this semester is over.
Has now officially visited every ER in this city in one semester.
It's 10AM, she's drunk blaring veggie tales and I have a paper to write you've got to be fucking kidding me
BTW send me your address and size of condoms you wish your lover was-- "if you build it, they will come"
you should have seen it. it was just a bunch of guys in togas chanting the username and password to a brazzers account we all share. best thing that has happened to our group
Oh please not the Easy Cheese again. That was weird.
Do you realize half our text conversations are you asking me for tit pics and me saying no?
Let's go. I'm waiting for my time to shine among the stars of never never land. Make sure you bring my Peter Pan costume this time. Shit's bout to get real glittery.
So you thought it was a good idea to make plans for the same time same place with the guy you were sort of dating AND his best friend you slept with?
I just left a 3 minute voicemail to the guy I want to fuck baby talking my cats and I don't know if I can delete it 😐
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