so high driving around just saw a woman in a pink shirt chillin riding a horse
so high at work that a 35 year old with his kids handed me visine and winked at me. you win with the horse though
it was like the sexual equivalent of when Wilson fell off the raft and floated away
If I die and they 'assume' it's natural causes, just go with it.
I knew we should have skipped class earlier, my lab partner is drunk from last night and making up his own experiments.
Nothing kills the mood when I am hooking up on the dance floor like the DJ saying Happy Valentines.
Besides the whole peeing blood for a week thing, it was the best sex of my life.
She tried to sleep on the front steps of her salon so she wouldn't be late for work and these people put her in a cab to my house. She is nothing if not responsible. Can u imagine her boss finding her there this morning?
Employee of the year! :)
Hahaha it was a great moment in my life. This must be what post child birth feels like, given you don't get a combined asshole/ vagina
Well its official, I'm into significantly freakier sex than even I thought possible.
This is classic penis vs brain.
You were so drunk that you didn't even notice when I switched out your shot of jäger for a shot of maple syrup...before or after you drank it.
lol hangovers are for mortals.
The modern romantic, surprising his gf w/ a gram of blow
My bed smells like the plague
I put on a face mask and masturbated for an hour... my face now has a green tint
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