Hehe I wanna Australian kiss.. Its like a French kiss but down under ;)
So apparently last night I was running around columbus circle station screaming that Obama was a pussy and that "waterboarding should always be an option" lol
i was drunk and our names rhymed...what was i supposed to do?
and then he said "my sister has the same underwear!" please come get me.
I'm not saying going to the volleyball games drunk on Tuesday night was a bad idea I'm just saying we shouldn't make a routine of it.
Also, at 1:30 I emailed myself saying, "are you there Margaret? It's me, god"
Let's cut to the chase. What days are we sleeping together this week?
Remembering I sold my brand new Blackberry to a stranger for a few pints = Worst night of my life. Now to work out what I did with my shoes.
Taking my underwear off at work was one of my better decisions this weekend
Abort mission; I repeat: Abort mission.I found an attractive one.
After the keg stand you collapsed, hit your head on the floor, started seizing and after 20 seconds got back up and said "hah, I remember my first beer"
I accidentally flashed three cops last night. Stone cold sober.
I'm almost too old to be on The Real World but feel like I'm too young to be on The Bachelor and I'm just really confused with my place in life.
i was making a gravity bong in my room and my dad walked in. he helped me finish. i love being home for the holidays.
Nope. I'm an adult now. I can successfully avoid to vomit in defiance of the porcelain god\n
Randomize
