turns out gay frats are just like normal frats, only with more v-necks
Note left in log book: "4:30am a guy was caught masturbating in the bathroom and passed out in his own juices and we had to take the door off the hinges."
You guys are open that late?
I get a nice feeling when i open my fridge and see it filled with thirty beers and half a leftover jimmy johns pickle.
bottle of wine in one hand cigar in the other. 5 am. topless on our fire escape. and she cleaned our bathroom... i like his new girlfriend.
What hospital were we in last night? Insurance needs to know
I still cannot believe I yelled at every guy at the bar "you wanna get in this clam?!"
I dare you try and top an Eiffel tower full of Margarita
The worst thing about it is now I have to find someone else to fuck in the library.
we used the fire extinguisher you had been cuddling with to decorate the cop car while they were inside arresting everyone
I just don't understand how we smoked the EXACT same thing and I feel fine but Tim's over here serenading his fifth bowl of fruit loops with Elton John's entire discography.
Dude, I lost my shirt, and my doorknob is gone. I'm not sure which I should find first
I just had some kinky fun in the back seat of my car behind a Ralph's in south county. How's your thanksgiving eve?
Why can't I come over and snuggle you and make you lick my boots
i got home safe but then alex started a fire so now we're at the hospital
Just remembered someone sprayed perfume in my mouth last night after convincing me it was vodka and that i tried to herd ducks around campus and bring one home.
Randomize
