SECOND walk of shame from the westside Hilton, SECOND foreign family w kids staring at me in my dress, glitter purse, spiky heels and booze breath. I said I was going to church. More confusion.
do you ever lay in the bath and watch the blood hit the water?
EWW. Don't discuss your period with me. You can go shave your back now.
Just try to lay there and not be pregnant.
Yes, she gives me platonic blowjobs as part of our friendship.
I can now tell my grandchildren Central Park has really great spots for quickies...
Sry I came all over your dress. Think of it as a Vegas souvenir.
Sweet. Warning: i have been drinking at work since 4. Plan accordingly.
The condom broke. Its OK tho, turns out I was just humping her thigh for 20 minutes. Jager dude, Jager.
I was woken up at 6 am by a second grader trying to give me a sweatshirt for a pillow
You should help rebuild my confidence with your dick. Altruism: Pass it on.
I woke up in someone's flat in Budapest and then got offered a free piercing before I left. Best. Hookup. Ever.
You wanna know what I want to eat? Questionable Mexican food before I go drink. Makes for excitement. Will I puke it up or shit my pants
I woke up and finished the bottle like a champ
What can i say, my face is nice and my body is just unreal. And my beer pouring/stealing is incredible \n
Well, if I’m not getting dick or sleep then I’m not interested.
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