I'm in a room alone pouting because I got the wrong nachos at taco bell.
It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
My dad is complaining about how his computer keeps getting viruses. I don't have the heart to tell him he needs to stop downloading so much porn.
she played "i just wanna get married" by jagged edge while we were having sex. why cant i avoid stage 5 clingers
You told him you loved him!?
I mean if he translated "Zi luve ku" as that then yes.
It's 10AM, she's drunk blaring veggie tales and I have a paper to write you've got to be fucking kidding me
Just missed the last train for another 5 hours. There are balls in or around the mouth of my life.
Rumble strips road head = magical
Well it's official... The first guy I ever gave head to now holds 2 world records. Should I text him asking if I can try and break my record?
i want to have his babies. i NEED to. shit i wont even ask for child support, he's that goodlooking.
Do you remember doing synchronized hip thrusts to Michael Jackson? Probably one of my favorite parts of the night
L'Shannah Tovah!
Whats that? My new stripper name?
I hate when I wake up and find my vibrator next to me. Such a waste of an orgasm...getting myself off in my sleep and not remembering
My dick has been in way too much crazy the past 2+weeks, but hey it feels good to fuck consistently again
I felt like a slutty ass cruella devil driving your old car, And I got in a fight with your wipers
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