no one should ever give us hovercrafts
He came in asked for the bathroom and came out 10 minutes later dripping wet took his redbull and left.
You know you're on day 1 of your period when the new mcdonalds commercial makes you cry
What a dumb baby whore.
I remember you licked my face and said that's all you're getting
Someone please drive out to my house to bring me a beer.. There are some in the fridge but I just can't get up
we somehow managed to fit a llama, a stripper pole and a hayride all into the same day.
Young lesbians are the worst. And also what got me through high school, sooooo
All I need is $1,500, a beach ready body, a bigger dick & this will be the best spring break ever.
When's the best time to point out that all of my orgasms this year have been self-administered? Valentine's day?
i'm 99% sure they had an orgy while i was passed out
Went and sat in the wrong fucking class for 30 mins, answering questions and shit. What ever this is i will be on it for the rest of the semester.
Why exactly is there a butt plug on the counter?
You had blacked out Skype sex? Wow we live in the future
Put on your bikini and meet me at the pool \nit’s cock o’clock!
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