Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

Sorry bow1234 hasn't picked any favorites yet.

ADVERTISEMENT

(484): View more from Pennsylvania

i guess. but if i can salvage this and still somehow see you naked i feel like that's a win

Fav 2 3290 752
share tweet
(405): View more from Oklahoma

i found literally half of a double sided dildo in my shower. i guess someone went home happy.

Fav 19 3714 1044
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(617): View more from Massachusetts

Do you think the Slutcracker will use the original score? I'll be so sad if they don't.

Fav 5 2900 1063
share tweet
(408): View more from California

who has not yet felt my sugrcially enhanced boobs. HurryI am at the bnar and it is 1:15 am

Fav 13 2823 1104
share tweet
(816): View more from Missouri

apparently dick flashing is a frowned upon sport here..... sorry girlfriends mom

Fav 3 1285 1890
share tweet
(413): View more from Massachusetts

I think the camel was justified in biting me.

Fav 8 1946 945
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(304): View more from West Virginia

Just got a blowie during the Avengers. It's weird knowing that the high point of your life just happened.

Fav 8 2830 858
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(843): View more from South Carolina

I gave him blue balls & ate the last slice of pie so the chances of a second date are slim...

Fav 2 194 380
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(636): View more from Missouri

Dude I cant right now. Were talking about pickles.

Fav 0 30 10
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT