Just got a script for 120 vicodin with 6 refills. I feel like michael jackson.
I could make treat bags
phone sex would be way better if there was an app for that...
I'm not 100% on this, but I'm pretty sure I just accidently talked my way into a threesome.
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
she said we were using the spray butter as air freshener
I can't believe i facilitated a beer for sweater vest deal last night...
I couldn't figure out her damn button fly jeans... IM NOT A FUCKING ENGINEER
Some kid just popped open a giant PBR and walked into his final...
She started giving me head while we were watching the Walking Dead premiere, WORST BJ EVER.
Someone has big plans this weekend. Just went to throw away the trash and saw packaging for 3 different vibrators on the top of the stack
The laundromat is nothing like In the pornos
No, I didn't meet up with him! That's when I had chlamydia.
That awkward moment when you bring a guy back to your place then have to tell him you only have magnums.
He stopped mid sex to say he was sorry that he couldn't make us work.continued. Stopped again to ask if it was crazy that he loved me.
That is not what no strings attached sex is about.
If I wanna spend the whole night tied up and getting railed I'm allowed to do so
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