This guy has a retainer. We're golden.
Well, i'm not sure how that works so i wish both you and your vagina luck on your voyage.
Attn: you have now used your free, one time admission to pleasure town. Thank you for visiting I hope you enjoyed your trip. All future trips to P.T. Will cost you full admission price. We have different pricing plans to accommodate different situations, and remember it is more of a bartering system than a set price. Your patronage is always welcomed and once again thank you for visiting and have a fantastic evening.
Man, I wish they all looked like that. Your vagina deserves to have a nice frame around it, and God's signature at the bottom.
Idk every story shes told me thats started with "back when i was a lesbian" has been my new favorite story
So. Do you think marshmallow vodka in hot chocolate while eating a graham cracker would = s'mores?
In some strange universe, yes
The sad part is I didn't even want to get laid. I just wanted the emotional connection, but my vagina was screaming "TOUCH ME. TOUCH ME RIGHT NOW BECAUSE MY DADDY ISSUES ARE MUCH DEEPER THAN MY EMOTIONAL NEEDS!" Vodka has a way of getting me out of my emotions and gets me fucked every time.
Dude the little bong I just got fits nicely in the cup holder in my car. The gods approve of my habits.
I'd say "I think I gave my TA chlamydia" is an accurate way to sum up my life.
Fun fact: the guy I banged last night. His middle name on his birth certificate is "Windstorm."
I'm over here trying to figure out how to get shake shack delivered to my bed and Jamie is having a child
Not my fault people bought me shots. waving a shot in my face is like waving a cock in yours
I really wanna treat my body good. Because i plan on doing drugs
When he pulled out it sounded like a balloon deflating
I tried saying sorry but instead I puked down her shirt and tried to clean it up... Now I have a bruise on my forehead. good news, before she left she wrote her number on my stomach with sharpie
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