God I can't wait to have my phone textbombed every night
Free body shot off of Sarah. Expires never.
did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
Probably, but last night was a special kind of drunk. It was a "let's see how drunk I can get without killing myself" drunk.
MTV running anti-sexting commercials is a slap in the face to everything our generation has accomplished.
Nobody in the ambulance liked me...
God and karma are having a fucking field day with my body today.
Some kids in a school bus just saw me jacking off in my car. This is how 89% of children find out about sex.
So apparently we wrote "Lube Shopping" in Paula's diary on every friday for the rest on the year....
Im coming down to miami this weekend
We shall drink from the everclear river
Just saw a man in a motorized chair roll by drinking a beer. It's 9:45 AM. I love Louisiana.
It is not a successful senior year unless you show up to campus without pants at least once, right?
If I were better looking, this would be the point where I'd resign myself to stripping.
I kid you not. He let me in into his house, showed me the putt putt in his backyard. Offered to play me.
I'm pretty sure even the managers want me to show up hungover my last day, it would be negligent and disrespectful to do otherwise
Randomize
