i miss you and i wish you were peeing between my legs right now. in a platonic way
I've thrown up so many times in the third floor bathroom of Baldwin that they should probably just go ahead and name it after me.
areolas are like halos for boobs.
Between the two of us weve fucked every guy at this table
threw up in a bar last night and got laid on an air mattress. my bucket list just got a lot shorter
Ps. The strap-on in the pic i sent you last night was not mine. Just wanted to clear that up.
do you think semen can infect my impacted wisdom tooth
speaking of graduation plans, i'm blacked out eating sausage
I could of sworn you were praying in the strip club.
Haha, oh man. I'm awake now. Slept in my headdress.
It was like die hard. Except with more penises.
I had 2 bags of iv saline fuilds for brunch and the buffet at the strip club for dinner. happy easter.
I wish you could just Google "people I've had sex with" and they would all just come up
He said he would get me a helmet and bedazzle it with my name and address so the cabs would know where to take me
I woke up with what has to be a whole pack of smarties loose in my bra. Was that your fault?
Randomize
