butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
Remember that time i walked in on your friend taking a huge shit?
Remember that time you hooked up with him?
i think i have reached a jessica simpson level of regret
Who is John, and why is his named carved into our toilet?
every facebook tagged picture of yours, you are either drinking, swimming or drunk in water
my goal was to make out with as many people dressed as batman as possible. I have my priorities.
Yo I found your batman costume.... It was in my pool with a shitload of beer cans
Blocking me on Facebook doesn't change the fact that you've had my penis in my mouth. So there's that.
I was looking at the storm clouds during my run and one oddly resembled ur penis
he called me 'mate' and i had to remind him that you dont call people mate who continously make your dick hard
please tell dad to clear the porn off his tablet before he lends it to anyone from now on
So I slept with some guy last night and when I woke up in the am couldnt remember his name. I text him n asked "How do you spell your name?" to try n find out and all he replied was "With an A." WTF!?
So far 2 of my professors caught me looking at their dicks
I'm gonna go take a shower so I can cleanly change into my drinking underwear.
If it were up to me his wife would never get his penis again, but I guess they have some sort of arrangement
Yes, an arrangement called marriage
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