this other lifeguard and I are actually considering paying a kid to shit in the pool
Her brother walked in on her giving me a bj and just laughed. I got a highfive before I left.
you puked out of a dead sleep and didnt wake up
No. untill you have done a puke that contains nothing but semen and tequila, you do not 'feel my pain'
I swear every time I make the effort to make my hair look nice, someone jizzes in it.
Nada. Shooting off confetti and wanted to see I'd u could see it from ur house.
Wow. Its not even 11am.
It was worse than when we pepper-sprayed my dick. I feel mislead.
Her boyfriend only talks to me because I know her period schedule
She used to be a real nice person. Now she's just a dick sucking machine
For u too. Could be years before u have a finger in ur ass
People have been asking me if I'm going to the reunion lately. It occurs to me that everyone wants me there to feel that much better about themselves.
I have a present for you
Like a legit gift, not just me showing up and getting naked
I think we should have a sex position advent calendar
Fuck you i've put so many pretzels in her shirt
oh i see... well this is a positive first step in you courting him for sex.
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