Just watched porn on a 60 inch plasma screen TV... So that's where the clitoris is
It will be a surprise...all i can say is stripper clown
She talked about nothing but beanie babies for 45 minutes. I'm never getting high with her again.
i thought they made a 7-hour walmart run, but they were actually in jail.
She opened a beer bottle with her armpit and then gave me a cigarette from the waistband of her underwear. I dont know if I want to be her or marry her.
Oh yeah forgot to mention that I referred to myself as the oral sex heavyweight champion last night
no, forget the keg and come see this. prego pants here is dunking chicken nuggets into pudding and crying over a cat show on animal planet.
What time did you start drinking?
Maybe.
Maybe isn't a time...
she tried to handfeed me fritos while yelling "PENIS TRAIN"
We have six bottles of wine and we are at target buying baby oil to grease up the sleds with, just in case you're interested.
I would have been the big man on campus...just flop my wang out on the table and how them what they were gonna deal with if they dropped the soap
He looked at me and just said "moist". The entire party shut down from uncomfortableness. He is an anti-party wizard.
I guess there's no delicate way to say "I'm 90% sure I sucked his dick in the bathroom of the bar."
So, my love of dick may have landed me in a cult. On the bright side, I now have a discount at Spencer's.
I need a fuck buddy with more available hours
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