What can I expect? While all of my friends are getting married, all of his friends are tripping on robitussin
i just picked a peanut m&m up off the floor. with my toes. and then proceeded to eat it.
We have sex, then he cooks. It's like a fantasy.
I had no idea a 5'8 girl could fit entirely on her knees in front of the passenger seat of a Sunfire, but I am very happy to now have that knowledge.
Tonight will bring shame to my future grandchildren.
She can drink whiskey without a chaser and has a fridge full of whipped cream. Girlfriend potential
laying on floor next to bathroom with vent on to give myself comfort and remind me that im not going deaf. what did i smoke?
He wouldn't let me ride him with a Ninja Turtles hat on...
I just blew my weed a kiss
I just remembered that you tried to trade me for a glass of wine
I woke up with Pop Rocks stuck to my ass
Just caught myself checking an online porn site while in a strip club. Might have a problem.
WHEN YOU HAVE SEX WITH A GUY FROM A DIFFERENT COUNTRY YOURE SUPPOSED TO NEVER SEE THEM AGAIN
He had a flex off with himself in the mirror but he thought it was someone else for at least 20minutes.
We broke the bed while I was handcuffed to the headboard and let's just say that was a hard one to explain to the RA
Randomize
