On this egg donor form, it asks "In the past 5 years, have you had sex for drugs or money?" It only gives a yes or no option and no place to explain myself. What do I do?
there r dinosaurs outside my house i hear them
pretty sure those are just snow plows....go back to bed
she acted like she'd never seen someone do speed off of a desk with a rolled up receipt. and she calls herself a grad student.
That's why they call him "the cheesegrater".
Gave a homeless guy 3 bucks earlier. Just saw him at the bar. He bought one beer and left. Happy to see my 3 dollars was well spent
He stripped down to boxers and then started flinging jello shots with a spoon into people's mouths like a catapult.
You kept hugging the big bouncer & feeling the other ones beard
It is a sign that I need a fresh start when Kelly Clarksons new album tells the story of my life.
We have so much sex to catch up on
Is it bad that I feel proud to be the first one to puke in the apartment? And I did it in style?
You straight up painted the counter with steak, tequila and beer. You owe me a knew toothbrush.
I just spilled grey goose in my hair. You could say I keep it classy for the family Christmas parties.
I'm sitting at dinner with my family looking over sexts. The thirst is far too real. They're talking about retail and I'm like haha, yes, you are all correct.
I've been trying to masturbate for the longest time now and so far I've accomplished getting tangled in my computer battery cord and phone charger and hitting my knee on my laptop.
after we fucked i left the room and when i came back he was patting his dick whispering "prouda you lil guy...prouda you"
Clearly the Stanley Cup Finals good luck hand job IS necessary. You let the whole team down.
Randomize
