Can i not drive my cunt home
i actually looked down at my cock today and said "whoa buddy, you need a haircut....(grimace) and a shower"
I just saw him at the bookstore and all I could think about was him licking your ass
Just saw a british exchange student take a flyer for free dental care. Yes.
dude i just figured out that the tostitos sign is two people eating chips and salsa. being high totally pays off sometimes
My parents just suggested that we tailgate the midnight christmas service. this is my gene pool.
He snuck out of bed at 9 am and came back with pizza and a bottle of wine. I think I'm in love!
He probably smells like baby powder and sexual identity crisis.
There's a man in a pumpkin/reaper outfit advertising a new head shop outside the Taco Bell. I love this town.
just found out that she named her cat after me.
drinking right out of the bottle and nobody bats an eye.
its good to be home.
I remember caressing his hands asking him if he moisturized, then i proceeded to put his hands on my face
My dad told me to bring weed to easter Sunday dinner..
I'm sorry for what I said when I was orgasming
I just bumped into this random I hooked up with a few years ago at Steve's party. Talk about a fingerblast from the past!
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