youve choked your chicken with your arm asleep and acted like it was some1 else right?
no, I didn't make it. Instead, i watched VH1 for... 13 hours? I use the question mark because I was using Flavor Flav's clocks to tell time after the first 3 hours.
I wish there was a Glade Plug-in for vaginas
Our hot neighbor just came over and asked for a toilet plunger...not so hot anymore
It's not called being bisexual its called making out with anyone that has a mouth
shes a 6ft ginger. she brings nothing to the table except for awkwardness
We're playing fucking games. GAMES. THIS IS BULL SHIT. IM GOING TO THROW UP ON THE BABIES AND LEAVE.
Gees I domt know what your deal was. You kept looking at Nick and shaking your head frantically and doing a weird motion with your hands
Tgat was the small dick alert
I wish someone would just come knock on my door and fuck me already so that me and my stuffed animals aren't the only ones who see my amazing spring break tan. I'm not getting skin cancer so I can just sit here abstinent.
What is a foreign vacation of stupidity without some fake names?
Apparently mr clean magic erasers don't clean blood off the ceiling
I don't know what you're doing this morning, but obtaining Plan B is my number-one priority.
I'm sorry for breaking our door. And being a bitch about it.
Texting people and counting condoms..we have like fourteen. Goal for this week: use all of them
But you''re still having sex with him. And a hobo convinced you to.
Randomize
