I feel like i just miscarried Jesus's baby...
It was like if Side-show Bob had a vagina for a mouth
You just kept rubbing her head and repeating "I really like your head, I want your head..." over and over for like 10 minutes straight... And she didnt even stop you.
I kinda wish he had even a slight idea of the sex I'm planning for his departure. I'm literally studying for it.
He must be back home now. He moved his box of beer from her porch to ours.
there may or may not be knives in your bed. I would check
is it possible i asked you to give me a preliminary pap smear?
Are you complaining because you're getting too much sex to find the time to masturbate?
Well, when you say it like that it sounds silly.
Omg having my Grindr go off at the planned parenthood is just not okay
I'm sitting in my room naked waiting for him. When he gets here im going to make him do 20 pushups and lick my clit for a hour
i want to have awesome sex and feel fuzzy.
My hand smells like rave and peanut butter.
I don't care if he's the coolest coworker, if he's living in his mom's basement at 30 you should not buy drugs from him
I just ate the lyft drivers bacon cheeseburger. Well fuck me this night escalated quickly.
you have to get here a cop came into the bar and she looks like Sarah Palin. I think I'm gonna try and bang her
Randomize
