I seriously can't date anymore I forgot how to hide my crazy
My life is like the prequel to "40 Year Old Virgin"
Buying beer for freshmen. No matter what they ask for, I'm getting them Colt 45.
Girl next to me just ralphed in a bag. Congrats class of 2010
I dont know, my roommate got arrested but I'm gunna get some tacos no matter what
So yeah you need to stop having near death experiences at McDonalds.
She is screaming bc she thinks you jumped out the window...please show her you just went out for a smoke
Because it was 5am and I had a shitty mixed drink and I was threatening to put my balls in your face.
Not the worst first impression I've experienced.
Yeah I went home with her... She had me take off everything but my shirt and from across the room goes, "Now dance. Just dance that dick over here"
I disagree, if your last name is Weiner then the sending of dick pics should be mandatory. I'd give him a pass.
He won't have sex to beyonce. I hate him.
My roommate just walked in on him eating me out ..happy finals week right?
I now have a "weirdest thing a guy ever did in bed" story. Cut my fingernails.
Yeah I'm gonna need you to stop it right there.I know this is supposed to be a safe space but Imma have to exit.
I'm telling you, I 'm beginning to think that my vagina is magical.
The career specialist read an Onion article to us. Please send help.
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