Is it really that bad? I heard it was like pooping. I like pooping.
Does getting a boner while watching the celtic women sing opera on ETV make me cultured?
Remember that time we were in the handicap bathroom snorting Molly at the stripclub. That was a defining moment in our friendship
Since your rent is paid til the first, we decided to use your apartment as the beer pong room. We apologize in advance for losing your security deposit.
You have not lived until you've seen your mother stumble into the house with one shoe on mumbling incoherently about tequila cupcakes.
Can we skip lunch and do power hour sex time from now on? I'll let you eat nachos off my body if you really need the food.
I made her orgasm until she cried. Four years of only having sex with dudes and I've still got it.
So this tall girl jumped in our cab and I was like hey I have pics of u on my phone. It wasn't creepy at all
You went into the shower with my roommate and cursed him out asking why he was there
I was stopped at a light on my way home and a priest threw holy water on my car. Seems fitting after last night.
I just saw a guy in a hazmat suit riding a tractor.
I can't tell if this is a hangover or just a perfect combination of shame and regret
Where you at? Come home and endure this shit show called "The Second Presidential Debate".
Between the deep breathing and nipple piercings , I thought I was in the twilight zone
Yeah. I got a Tetnus shot then partied like it was 1999.
Randomize
