it makes me cry that so many people are going to see you naked someday.
So thanks to the xanax and vodka memory erasering combo i wake up only to reopen a picture of some very familiar balls
just had to re-breakup with her. it was like shooting a dead horse that was crying and talking.
threw up in the library. i should be embarrassed, but i'm willing to bet that i'm one of the first so i'm kinda proud.
I think we can all look back on last night and categorize it under, " reason why Cory can't be left at the bar by himself"
They both just did a shot, head butted each other, did another shot and then slapped each other in the face. These could be the two guys we've been looking for all our lives
Chicken salad taco, you know, when you're out of bread and crackers, and high.
he broke off your car antennae to use as a walking stick before he smoked because he claimed to lack the facial strength needed to open his eyes when he's high
google maps should a have a setting for this. like I AM ABANDONING EVERYTHING TO MEET A GIRL WHO IS 10 HOURS OF MILES AWAY. HOW DO WE DO THIS OPTIMALLY?
On a separate note, I just found out some condoms aren't vegan. Problem.
Hahahaha I can't wait for you to ask "wait. are there any animal by products in that?"
Well we went from the roof to the stairwell to an air mattres. One day were going to fuck in a bed
I saw a classic trojan enz laying on his desk. So he's probably not into the kinky shit.
My poor liver. I drank enough on NYE to sustain an alcohol addiction for the entirety of 2015.
I went to BBQ fest on Wednesday and came home wearing a different shirt, so I think I did some good damage.
Sex and compliments. The way to my heart
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