My RA just tried to write me up for having sex too loudly during quiet hours.
then he said "your boobs looked so much bigger on girls gone wild"
I forgot about that,good spring break.
Living well is not the best revenge. Fucking his brother is.
I'd invite him but there's too many people who have fucked me going already
I'm sorry for coming into your work place and trying to smuggle you out in my purse.
Well, i'm not sure how that works so i wish both you and your vagina luck on your voyage.
It's official. I now have that "I was drunk and needed the money" college story to share later in life.
I cannot believe I said bareback movement...
There are apples in the microwave and a cup of twigs in the fridge. I think she's hiding in the pantry, I can hear her giggling. Leaving her to it.
Haha, I gave you the rest of the cash I had on me and you bought 3 shots for yourself and beer for everybody except me FUCKFACE.
the evidence suggests last night I either took a bath in beer or drank 18 beers while in the bath. either one sounds good to me. sad i don't remember it
She showed up after 3 hours and proceded to make us all feel like resonable human beings. I dont know how she did it but she did it.
You want to know how I feel? I feel like Cady Heron pushed me in front of a bus last night.
I'm so jealous of your sex life. You know it's awesome when thinking about the sex you had last night brings you tears of joy.
Sounds good. I'm hoping to have my life together by next week but you never know I guess.
Randomize
