She rubs her butt on the bed & then she growls..
dude sorry but u no that when a guys 'likes' ur pic on facebook it only means he was just jacking off to it.
Somehow last night, my dad got me so drunk that I ended up throwing up on the couch, turning the cushions over to hide it, and going to sleep on them.
for real. he might as well bring dogs if they're lower than a 7.
She was indeed spoonfeeding you potato salad out of that giant bowl with a giant spoon. Dont feel special, she was giving it to everyone that left the bar.
Ok. So I've woke up in a hospital. New thing to top that.... Waking up and realizing you've been locked inside the bar by urself at 430 am and all the doors are locked by key
I just realized I turned down a booty call too. To make cheesecake. God help us all
It's either gonna be a cock in my mouth or a burger. You decide which.
I'm imagining a seal in an ugly shirt hahahahaha Percocet
Tell her this is the Disneyland of penises.It's a magical place everyone should visit once in their life.
Please come quick there are people in suits here judging me
I cannot, in good conscience, let you talk to a guy who wears Chaps and a knit beanie
He's watching Always Sunny and eating refried beans straight from the can.
How was your day?
Peaceful. I left the house to get paid and get fried chicken.
there is another microwave in the elevator.
Randomize
