First night home from college and I already forgot that walking around nearly naked with my laptop open to smut porn isn't acceptable. Sorry, mom.
my elementary bus driver served me drinks last night. He hooked me up
yes because when i jack off the first person i think about is christina applegate
True Life: I puke at bars and try to catch it in my hand...then walk away like it didn't happen
so I have this game called 14 beers left. and we both have to drink 7 before we leave
he said no girl had ever swallowed his cum before
he probably also told you he thought u were pretty
my mom just informed me that im way nicer when im high and offered to supply my weed until our house guests leave.
does that include her cleaning your bowl?
Excused from finishing the term project because my lab partner got arrested. For the second year in a row. Public school, I love you.
He just found another high guy at wal-mart. There now friends. His friend is eating a cupcake
Will you just get over yourself and come over here and give me that dick...then you can go back home and continue to cry over us breaking up. Thank you
they have a video of him in his boxers making a snow angel in the hallway is his own vomit and coca cola.
You have no idea what this goes for my ego. I literally made you cum in your sleep.
How good was the sex? She sent me a fruit basket the next day.
I woke up next to him with nothing on and my thong around his neck. I just put my clothes on and left, but he still has my thong.
Its official, kitchen-couch is my favorite.
You passed out again didn't you?
its likely that this occurred.
Randomize
