how was the sex?
he smelled like pickles and burnt hair.
well, there's that.
Watching water boil has never been so amazing. I love wake-and-bakes.
You weren't just peeing. You were like grinding on it. And you tried to pee in the washing machine first.
I mean, we do coke and have sex occasionally...I wouldn't call that a relationship.
So the doctor told me that I am starting to showing the early signs of liver cirrhosis. Thank you Jack Daniels for making the first 26 years of my life awesome.
Is "you left your socks here, please come get them" a good way of saying "come fuck me?"
I can't leave your house without my underwear spending the night.
Her dog trainer Fuck buddy is over here again. She sounds like a squeaky toy and he talks to her like he talks to the dog. I CAN HEAR EVERYTHING!!!
I'm really sorry I hooked up with your student on the dance floor..
I'm not in bed, I'm driving and puking at the same time.... first for everything
So if I run into you on the street, I'm supposed to just stop drop and suck your dick?
My ass is in a myriad of pain right now
Lesson learned - Taco Bell before a long night of BDSM is a BAD idea
I mean, you've had my nipples in your mouth now, so I think we've reached a certain level of friendship.
thanks for the bj man. also make sure you close the gate behind you. the chickens are out.
So I guess I walked across campus with "pat my ass" in sharpie on my forehead.
You deserve it, you colossal cock block.
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