Kind of a slow process. Played 9 holes with her yesterday. Wish one of them was hers
i cant be the least bit upset about his new gf cause all i think is that she has to put things in his ass
Nope it's a specific set of cards not like a normal ace, queen king thing....kinda like UNO, but instead of yelling UNO you get shitfaced
I can actually hear my brain cells scream as they die when she speaks.
She has her iPod in her ears slippers and sweats on and is walking around the house up and down the stairs getting "exercise" she just stopped for a water break
I just put fruit snacks in my sangria instead of real fruit. Its like freshman year all over again..
We couldn't afford sangria freshman year. We're lucky we had fruit snacks..
my vagina hasn't met your boyfriend yet ... makes me sad
I don't care how sexy you think I look in my scrubs. Wanting a blow job is not a medical emergency.
listen. he fixes things. buys me drinks and sticks his penis in my vagina. age means nothing at this low point in my life.
No matter how long you've been away, there's nothing quite like pooping at your parents' house
Currently looking up Winnie-the-Pooh porn.
Can I just go naked and covered in glitter?
When I woke up I was spooning with a block of cheese. Like, cuddling. Me and the cheese we nestling...
I came twice and when I was done I petted his head and said "you did good kid you did good" and just laid back smiling. Tell me I'm not awesome.
My boss just offered me a vodka mixed drink at work I do not have a real job
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