Goodnight sugar queer
Sugar queer??
Why does my predictive text prioritize 'queer' over 'puffs'?
he urdandictionary'ed 'tease' on his phone and made me read through all the definitions. Am i really that bad?
You slept in the bed with him... with your top off.... and just made out with him....
I'm still trying to figure out how you came back with chinese food, and a spoon covered in icing saying 'cake..'
I guess I'm in a committed relationship. We just had shot 1 of 3 of Gardasil. I'm now dead inside.
i cannot be the only guy who has bought the every day with rachael ray magazine for use as porn
I think I just asked the Greek gyro guy on a yoga date.
Only sluts go out in this weather carpe diem boys
At least now when I say "never again" the likelihood is that it won't actually happen again the next weekend...that my friend is called growth
I have way too big of a thanksgiving food baby to enjoy any of my old high school booty calls
You tried to sit down... There was a distinct lack of couch.
I tried to twerk on a barn in 3 inch heels at a party last night and nose dived into mud. These were all new friends. I'm probably not allowed back. Cool.
He's attempting to seduce me with thanksgiving-themed sexual metaphors... It's working.
Hypothetically, I throw a party and my ex-boyfriend and my current fuck buddy are in the same house... what should I do?
How many beds are in the house? Hypothetically...
I'm too drunk to make ramen. What the fuck is this.
is it bad that im laying on a beach towel in my room with my lights on high pretending to be tanning on the beach in the summer?
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