we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
when did we get to this "texting at random" level on friendship?
she makes me feel like im THAT guy in the taylor swift song
You drank almost the entire bottle of everclear and wanted to walk around. I guess your best friends sister is a cop and you wanted her to arrest you like the lil wayne song.... so sorry dude.
I'm going to pre plan my black out tonight. I think I'll set a change of clothes out on my bed and unplug the oven.
He did not want a thank you for helping me move in bj. I don't know how to thank him now.
Congrats. You are not detrimental enough to my psyche to be discussed during this mornings therapy appointment. Please follow up next week to see if you made the cut.
You get to be the grown up. Leave a ciabatta by his face.
Make the kitchen floor stop waving. Im trying to lay on it
No one should ever have to Neosporin their nipples. At least he apologized.
If you go to Tinseltown tonight. First bathroom on the left, second stall. Avoid. It's still coming to terms with what I did to it.
We left the bar and you kept yelling "ONWARD SCION, TO GLORY!!"
On the flip side, we did almost have sex wearing a gorilla mask and deer antlers.............
I'm in the recliner and i have a bottle of wine wedged in my cleavage, drinking from a straw. Clever and classy or pathetic and sloppy?
so i fell out of a tree on the ave last night. someone told me there was alcohol at the top. bastards.
Randomize
