thought so. i woke up and he was playing with my eyeliner. I MAKE GREAT CHOICES.
Lady with a stroller in a bar. Think she's out of my league?
If I send you a picture of the guy passed out in the bath tub, will u be able to identify him?
It was as if you forgot how to speak normally. All of your words came out either backwards or in song form
He said last night that he'd never had such a great conversation and such a great handjob at the same time.
Doing lines of coke through pieces of licorice. Because I can
Old woman told me I looked like her son and then she started explaining to me how she wanted me to fuck her
I left my bra and a book at his place. He's a hot Scandinavian who is into physics and computers - had to step up my game.
I JUST WANTED TO GET SOME MOTHER FUCKING TACOS I AM SINGLE AS FUCK TACOS BRING PREOPLE TOGETHER OKAY
I AM GETTING LAID TONIGHT YES HAPPY DAY PRAISE JESUS ALMIGHTY IN HEAVEN DEAR GOD CHRIST YES DADDY YAAASSS
2017 is gonna be explosive... Already watching fireworks out the window while shit my brains out. Happy Ew Year
Someone just needs to roll me into a blanket burrito and feed me drugs
They gave me 4 meds at the health center and said not to take alcohol with any of them. Guess ill wait until tomorrow to feel better.
not only did I call my ex crying but drunk me also deleted the phone log so I had no warning when I saw him in class
Took the ex out to the bar, then left with her and her best friend....and you said this was a bad thing.
Randomize
