do you know mcdonalds refuses to give out large cups of water now? you have to buy a bottle or they give you a small cup. No exceptions.
RUDE.
I said FINE, then I'd like 7 small waters and 2 of those nifty carrying cases to carry about my h2o.
outsmarted mickey deeeees
Of course she said it wasn't that good, I don't bring my A game to pity fuck the thrice divorced girl from work
She said, "I don't really go out much, but my husband recently cheated on me" and I don't remember anything after that.
I'll be really easy to find... I'm the naked one rolling around in cats.
Imagine getting smashed in the dick by a basketball. A basketball made of metal. With spikes. That's pretty much what his dick looked like.
I have got to stop letting people hang ornaments from my nipple ring.
Tis the season.
Piñatas plus fireworks don't mix well
This is why we can never be together. Well that and we r married to other ppl but that's very minor detail compared to the coffee issue
Sometimes intelligent conversation doesn't mix well with a romantic interest. It's possible the two are best kept separate. Toys should just stay in the toy box.
apparently when we were gone the parents play strip connect 4
Had a rough day but my boyfriend made that all better by going down on me while letting me watch Top Gear... I'm buying the engagement ring tomorrow
As a paramedic, it's completely unacceptable to black out on a monday. I cant handle 3 dollar shot night.
Wait... so you had sex and then your ear drum ruptured? I'm not sure if I want to ask if the two are related...
She said cowgirls can can pee standing up and proceeded to pull up her dress and drop her underwear.
That's the 3rd negative pregnancy test this month. I'm on a roll.
Randomize
