watching jon and kate + 8 right now is like watching my parents split up
if i died would you start the facebook group?
Just wrote a paper about alcohol abuse that sounded like my weekend...
Ive created a fbook group called "threesome" and invited two girls. Im not going to say a word and just see what happens.
The bathroom is trashed. Someone took down all the rings of the shower curtain and Scott threw up on the curtain liner. All the soap and shampoo is in the guest bedroom and the lightbulbs are in a drawer. And there are vom footprints.
Thank you for the breast cancer awareness themed circle of death. Had it been any other time I would not have played topless.
And yes, in case u were wondering a 25 year old high school agriculture teacher did just hit on me At Walmart bc of my pinata
His rich uncle has six months to live. I feel pregnant.
We will have to go big on the 4th! Nothing says independence like the impending doom of an ankle monitor
he went down on me to a drake song and now i think i need a penicillin shot
Mom kept me on a leash as a kid, did you know this?
When she went in the beer store I got to hold it.
Does she know she is talking to people who slam shots of fireball and chase it with vodka?
I give out orgasms like candy and ride a motorcycle...how is that not appealing
I don't know how I got home but I'm pretty sure the guy in my closet had something to do with it
The guy in the room next to me just offered to hide the next dose of morphine he will get for his broken leg under his tongue and then swap it with me in exchange for a roll of the good toilet paper my parent brought for me last they visited. The psych ward is a lot more hardcore than I thought.
Randomize